Here is a selection of Clancy Productions' original material, available for a low, low purchase price. If you're interested in licensing the pieces for performance, or purchasing in bulk, please contact us.
The Fire Sermon by John Clancy (25 minutes, male 30-40) is a monologue by a professor and part-time fire instructor on the Ohio public school circuit. It is a beautiful, hilarious, and heartbreaking piece in which he reveals that he himself was the victim of a fire -- one that destroyed his home and robbed him of his family. He consistently speaks over the heads of his audience (12-16 year olds) and in an odd and inappropriate way.
Excerpt: "...I perform this task for no monetary gain. Or loss, for that matter, it’s a wash. They pay for the transportation, I pay for the meals. But I’d be eating anyway, whether I was here in your nondescript little town or back home hiding beneath the bed, either way I’d have to eat to survive, to continue as do we all, as do all things, so in that way my appearance here before you is a wash. Even steven. Tie game, zip to zip. I hate this job. It’s a bullshit job. It’s not even a job, they don’t pay me. It’s a thing I do. It fills my days, it interrupts yours.
"Some facts for you to consider: 25% of all people killed in home fires are asleep at the time. Smoke alarms save lives. Every year 250 people die and 2000 people are injured in fires that start in the living room. Your living room is, perhaps, not aptly named. Workplace fires kill 200 and injure more than 5000 workers each year. Don’t get a job. Less than 10% of all places of public assembly have a fire evacuation strategy in place and of those less than 10% that do, 85% have never published, posted or practiced that strategy. So, you’re pretty much on your own out there. ..."
The .pdf will be available for download once your transaction is complete.
The Broccoli Incident by John Clancy (12 minutes, male 30-60) is an unusual comic monologue by a man at a turning point in his life -- he no longer trusts anything he believes, nor his wife, a woman he has known for 15 years.
Excerpt: ..."And so I thought, and here the second horror was born, perhaps I have changed. For that’s the thing about drifting through your life. You’re never really sure where you are. And if you’ve stopped having or caring about opinions, except to the extent that they are in general alignment with the opinions of those around you, then it’s hard to pinpoint exactly who you are, from moment to moment. I could have changed a dozen times in the last few years and not known it. How would I know?
"And so in a state of quiet, near-perfect panic I looked at the broccoli. And I picked up my fork and I stabbed it. And I lifted it to my mouth and began chewing. And I ate the broccoli. ..."
The .pdf will be available for download once your transaction is complete.